Perfectly Clear

Perfectly Clear

From my journal on December 12, 2017:

“Today I get results from the pathology lab of the tissues removed in surgery.  On September 12, exactly 3 months ago, we began this whirlwind story.  You have been with me, given unexplainable peace and performed little miracles (little miracles…is that an oxymoron?) all along the way. Whatever I hear today, Your presence, power and peace will be sufficient to handle.  Give me faith over fear.”

“Thank You for how You have aligned circumstances and devotions to speak to me through this time.  I know I can count on You to keep delivering.  Keep me tethered close to You.  A clean bill of health is not my shelter. You and You alone are my shelter and safe place.”

A friend’s son was having an appointment with a brain tumor clinic that day and she was asking for prayer.   I texted, “I will be praying for you as you receive the results of the testing.  God is good and will use whatever He allows into your life for good.  So, no matter what you hear today…good will be the end result. ‘Cast all your cares on Him, because He cares for you.’  His grace is sufficient.”

I picked up a book given to me by a friend.  Inside was an index card of verses she had prayed over me.  The second verse she had written was 1 Peter 5:7, “Cast all you anxiety on Him because He cares for you.”  The chapter I read that morning was entitled “Present” with the verse Isaiah 41:10, “Fear not, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God.  I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.  The first verse my friend had written on that index card.

Then in a devotional given to me by another friend, the devotion for December 12, 2017 said, “I am taking care of you.  Feel…the security of being enveloped in My loving presence.” I had just prayed that His presence would be sufficient for me and that He and He alone was my safe place, the chapter in the book I had just read was entitled. ‘Present’ and now I am being reminded again! “Every detail of your life is under My control.  Moreover, everything fits into a pattern of good for those who love Me and are called according to My design and purpose.” This is one of my favorite verses and one I use frequently to bring comfort to myself and others although I always like to add part of the next verse.  The next verse spells out what that purpose is...to be conformed to the image of Jesus.  “If you could only see how close I am to you and how constantly I work on your behalf, you would never doubt that I am wonderfully caring for you.” And one of the verses listed at the bottom of that devotion was 1 Peter 5:7, “Cast all your anxiety on Him because He cares for you.”

Ok, Father, You have my attention.  This is the 3^rd time this verse has been brought to my attention today.  The first time You gave it to me for the text to my friend.  Now I see it 2 more times.  What does this mean?

And then I continued with my Scripture reading in Mark 9:1-13. I usually read Scripture first and then read the other devotionals.  Not sure why I changed up the order on that day.  This is the story of the transfiguration of Jesus. After this amazing thing happened, Jesus instructs the disciples He brought with Him not to tell anyone what they had seen until after He had risen from the dead.  The disciples didn’t understand what Jesus meant by “rising from the dead.”  I wrote, “They don’t understand why Jesus MUST suffer much and be rejected.  They can’t see God’s amazing plan of redemption and power and glory!”

It is the same with me…I don’t understand “why?” But I don’t have to.  I just have to believe that God has an amazing plan of redemption, power and glory for suffering.  He will reveal it all at the proper time.

I open my First 5 app.  It says, “Father, I believe You have an amazing plan for my life --- suffering included.”  “Like Peter, we aspire to pitch our tent where life is glorious.  We try to sidestep the suffering and quickly settle in the places where life is pain-free and perfect.  We want to cling to what is good, but we would ultimately miss God’s best.  We…long for perfection and completion.  We want the perfect moments of the mountaintop experiences, but we don’t want to persevere through the pain.  We can’t get to the glory without enduring the cross.” 

Then the prayer, that I agreed with, “I bow my knee to Jesus today, trusting Him with both the moments of perfection and the times of pain.  Help me to live to the glory of His Name!”

In the More Moments section, 1 Peter 5:6 was listed.  “Humble yourselves, therefore, under God’s mighty hand, that He may lift you up in due time. And since you have to read the next verse… “Cast all your anxiety on Him because He cares for you.”  4^th time today!  Ok, Father, You CARE for me!

And though God had made it perfectly clear that He cares for me and that He is with me, I still wasn’t prepared for what I would hear from the doctor that day.

Clear margins and lymph nodes on the right.  Clear margins on the left but one of the three lymph nodes removed from the left side had cancer.