Do Not Fret

Earlier this month, I was feeling a little anxious.  I have been trying to learn not to look to food or television or Facebook when I need comfort.  I know that if I need comfort, I need to turn to the Comforter. So, I took out my Bible and opened to Psalm 37.  It has been a favorite Psalm ever since I heard Charles Stanley preach on it many years ago. Another reason I like it, is because it uses the word, “fret.” My dear husband loves to tell me, “Don’t you fret now.”  So, as I read the Psalm it’s like I can “hear” God saying, “Don’t you fret now.”  When I told Pat this, he was amused.  He said he never knew he was quoting Scripture.

As I read, I journaled:

Vs 1 Do not fret because of evil men, or be envious of those who do wrong; (DO NOT FRET because of cancer or be envious of those in good health.)

Vs 2 For like the grass they will soon wither, like green plants they will soon die away.(For like the grass, cancer will soon wither, like green plants cancer will soon die away.  What do I do in the meantime? While I’m waiting?)

Vs 3 Trust in the LORD and do good.  (Do the things You have called me to do: take care of my family, pray for others, serve others, study, draw near to God, memorize Scripture.  I just need to keep doing the things He’s asked me to do: Bible Drill, Women’s Ministry, mentoring) Dwell in the land. (Keep on living…do what I would normally do…just LIVE!) and enjoy safe pasture.  (Enjoy the many blessings God has provided…my husband, my children, my family, my friends)

Vs 4 Delight yourself in the LORD. (focus on Jesus, read His Word, talk with Him, worship and praise Him) And He will give you the desires of your heart.  (Many of my desires are between me and the Lord.  But here are a couple I listed: that me and my family would fulfill the purposes for which He created us, provision for our emotional, relational, spiritual and physical needs until death)

Vs 5 Commit your way to the LORD; trust in Him and He will do this: (to the best of my ability, I commit my way to You and trust You…help me where I am weak.)

Vs 6 He will make Your righteousness shine like the dawn. The justice of your cause like the noonday sun.

Vs 7 Be still before the LORD and wait patiently for Him; do not fret when men succeed in their ways, when they carry out their wicked schemes. (DO NOT FRET when it looks like satan is succeeding, when he carries out his wicked schemes, like cancer, financial loss or relational distance.)

Father, You are good and You have good planned for me and my family. Cancer WILL NOT thwart Your plans.  Help me to trust You as I wait.  Help me to look past physical circumstances and trust what You are doing in the spiritual realm. In Lamentations 4:22, You promise that You will not prolong my exile.  I feel as though I have been exiled to the land of cancer.  Help me believe my pastor’s prayer for me; “That You would be so visible through this, that no one can doubt that You are real and that You keep your promises.” Be so visible that I can’t doubt, my family can’t doubt, our families can’t doubt, our church family can’t doubt, our community can’t doubt, all of those who are praying for me can’t doubt, all of those who are graciously reading this blog can’t doubt that You ARE real and You DO keep Your promises.

Vs 8 Refrain from anger and turn from wrath; DO NOT FRET, it only leads to evil. (Fretting leads to me fearing and not trusting Your goodness and that is evil!)

Vs 9 For evil men will be cut off, (For satan and his followers will be cut off!) but those who hope in the LORD will inherit the land.  (You have a good inheritance for me…a good plan for my future.)

Vs 10 A little while and the wicked will be no more, though you look for them, they will not be found.  (A little while and satan will be no more, though I look for him, [I don’t know why I’d be looking for him!] he will not be found. Hallelujah!)

Vs 11 But the meek will inherit the land AND enJOY great peace!

It’s almost time for me to leave to go to church but vs 19 has me in tears. (I guess I had peeked ahead.) In times of disaster (cancer) they WILL NOT wither.  (This is a promise, please don’t let me wither.)  In days of famine, they will enJOY plenty! (Provide plenty and help us to enjoy what You provide for us until we come home to You!)

This is just a little insight as to how I journal and how I interact with God and His Word.  When I had finished, I felt much more at peace and my faith in God was strengthened. I was comforted by the Holy Spirit and His promises.

Tomorrow I have an appointment with my oncologist/surgeon to discuss plans for treatment. During this waiting time, I have been doing a lot of research, making a lot of changes and praying.  Please pray for me as I talk with the doctor that I won’t feel bullied into making choices that I am not ready for.  Pray that I will be a good ambassador for Christ as I talk with her.  Pray that I would be bold and stand for what I believe God wants me to do at this time.

 

Did God Give Me Cancer

Did God give me cancer?  James 1:16 states, “Every good and perfect gift is from above coming down from the Father…”  Cancer is NOT a good OR perfect gift…so it is NOT from God.

When God created the world, it was all very good. (Genesis 1:31) God did not create death or anything that would lead to death.  Adam and Eve could have been immortal. Death and things that lead to death were brought about by sin. Everyone born after sin came into the world would be born dead spiritually and would eventually die physically. That is the consequence of sin for every one of us.  Death was not God’s plan. Death is a consequence of sin. “For the wages of sin is death.” Romans 3:23

And ever since mankind sinned, God has been working to give us life. God is a God of LIFE not death.  Jesus said, “The thief comes to steal, kill and destroy.  I have come so that they may have LIFE and have it in abundance.  I am the good shepherd.  The good shepherd lays down his life for his sheep.”  John 10:10-11

Jesus came to this earth to live a perfect, sinless life so that He could become the perfect sacrifice, the perfect payment for my sins and yours.  Jesus came to earth, so that, through His death we could gain spiritual life and live eternally.  God wants life for us!  Especially eternal life!!!

Jesus also came to show us how to live an abundant life by living life in the way that God designed it, in obedience to Him.  You see, mankind’s sin brought spiritual and physical death, but my individual sins will bring loss, death and destruction to my life and to the lives of those I impact.  My individual sin brings about the opposite of life.  If I follow Jesus and have His Spirit living in me, He gives me the power to walk in abundant LIFE.  Life is what God wants for me AND for YOU!

So where does this cancer come from?  I think it comes from one of 2 places.  Either it is part of the “things that lead to death” that came from mankind’s original sin or it is an attack from satan.

You can read about the consequences of sin in Genesis 3:18-24.  The consequence of sin is not only death, but also pain, toil, and suffering.  Life would no longer be as God originally created it or intended it.  Death is not always a sudden occurrence, but it is also a process of bodies breaking down over time.  We begin dying as soon as we are born.  Cancer is just one of the dying processes brought about by sin…not necessarily an individual’s sin, but sin in general.

From studying the book of Job, I know that God allows satan a limited “reign” in our lives.  satan can do nothing to us unless God allows it.  Why does God allow satan to torment or test us?  I don’t know the answer to that question.  He’s God and He has a purpose for everything He allows.  Does it make Him a bad Father if He allows this? Our perspective may be, “Yes!”  But Scripture tells us, “You are good and what You do is good…” (Psalm 119:68) There are many other Scriptures that describe God’s character as good.

In the case of Job, once God put an end to satan’s oppression, God restores everything satan had taken from Job two-fold.  Job comes to know God in a more intimate way.  Job and his friends realize that God is much bigger and more mysterious than they can comprehend.  (We DO NOT have the capacity to understand God.) And Job lives to see his children to the 4^th generation and dies, “old and full of days.” (Job 42)   From Job, it seems that if God allows satan a limited reign in our life and we respond appropriately, His plan is to bless us afterwards.

BUT, whether this cancer is a product of sin or satan’s oppression, GOD IS STILL IN CONTROL of it.  God can heal cancer with one word. God can end satan’s oppression with one word.  God is not only a good Father, but He is also an amazing Redeemer.  He can redeem death, sin, toil, suffering, and pain. He redeemed Jesus' suffering, pain and death with resurrection and the payment of my sin and yours, if you will accept it.  He redeemed Jesus' suffering, pain and death with eternal LIFE for ALL who would believe. And He can redeem cancer.  He can somehow transform anything into LIFE. He's just amazing like that.  And I expect Him to do so in the case of this cancer.

Romans 8:28, 29b We KNOW that ALL things work together for the GOOD of those who love God, who are called according to His purpose…to be conformed to the image of His Son.

It doesn’t really matter why I have cancer.  But I know God did not give it to me.  But He WILL work it together for my good and for the good of those that I impact, if I love Him.  And I do love Him. And one way He wants to redeem this cancer, is to make me look more like Jesus in the process. That’s a good thing.

AND when He redeems this cancer, He WILL receive glory and praise.