Written
February 1, 2018
So, I saw
the chemo doctor and he said I definitely need chemo. He called a doctor from Baylor and told him
the stage of the cancer (Stage III T4 N1 MO) and just from that and no further
history, that doctor also said I need chemo.
His office called my doctor’s office to have an echocardiogram
scheduled.
The next
day, I get a call from my doctor’s office with questions about chemo and am I
taking it. I tell them I don’t know what
my options are. Because I am confused
about why my doctor would say one thing and these other 2 doctors, along with
the radiation doctor says something else, I did further research online about
skin involved and non-skin involved cancers.
What I find
out is that small skin involved cancers less than 3 cm. often act like and have
the same prognosis as non-skin involved cancers. Especially those that started near the skin
in the first place. My tumor at it’s
largest measurement was 2 cm. It only
involved the dermis and not the epidermis. I was hopeful that my doctor would
know this information and tell me that it was up to me to choose, but that she
didn’t recommend chemo other than the estrogen binding/lowering pill. My
appointment was moved from the 30th to the 25th.
I don’t know
how to pray. Do I ask that God cause all
my doctor’s to agree on chemo? Do I ask
that they don’t agree and that He help me choose what is best for me? All I
know to pray is that God intervene and His will be done. And that I will be
sensitive to His leading.
On the 24th,
I receive a call from my doctor’s office saying they were going to schedule me
for port placement on the morning of the 26th. “Dr. C. does agree with chemo???” I ask.
I see Dr. C
on the 24th and she confirms her agreement with the other
doctors. I want to show her the research
I had found online. (I know she probably has to pray every time before she
walks through the door to deal with me.
I told Pat I was a difficult patient.
When he asked why, I told him because I ask too many questions and read
the internet too much!) She doesn’t give me time to ask many questions. Says
she is running behind. Asks if I consent
to port placement the next morning. Then leaves and lets her nurse deal with
me.
Because all
the doctor’s agreed, for whatever reason, that I need chemo, I must just trust
that this is God guiding me. Although I am not excited about chemo, I do not
sense in any way, God telling me not to do chemo.
A port was
placed into my cephalic vein so that chemo can be given through that port
instead of having to get an IV started each time I have chemo. My veins are small and because they can’t use
my left arm for blood draws or IV’s, it makes drawing blood and IV insertion
difficult at times. I have had several
people that were either unable, wouldn’t even try and would get someone else or
would take several times to draw blood or insert IV’s. Port’s are normal for most IV chemo
patients. I was very happy to have one
so that I wouldn’t have to worry about accessing a vein each time I have
treatment.
Chemo is
scheduled to begin on February 12, if insurance approves it. I will receive Adriamycin
along with Cytoxcin every other Monday for 4 treatments. Then he will switch the medication to Taxol
that will also be given every other Monday for 4 treatments. He will also have a Neulasta patch applied at
each chemo visit. Neulasta is supposed
to help keep my white blood cell count up.
If my white blood cell count gets too low, my body won’t be able to
attack any infection that arises. Blood
tests will be done every week to watch my white blood cell count. If it gets too low or if I get sick, it will
cause me to miss treatments until the cell count is where they need it to be or
until I get well. If treatments happen
with no treatment delayed, my last chemo treatment will be on May 21.
Most people
want to know, “Will this chemo make you lose your hair.” The answer is, unless God intervenes,
“Yes.” So I will be sporting some
scarves or possible even a wig or 2 in the upcoming months. Pat thinks it could
be fun being with “different women” as I change my looks. He said we might even get some rumors
started. So I’m warning you, if you see
Pat with a blonde, it’s probably just me.
Well, it better be!
How has God
encouraged me in the past few days? Here are just a few ways through Sarah
Young’s book Jesus Calling: Enjoying Peace in His Presence.
“…you are
being transformed from the inside out.
As you keep your focus on Me, I form you into the one I desire you to
be. Enjoy…Hold My hand in childlike
trust and the way before you will open up step by step.” pg 26
“Give up the
illusion that you deserve a problem-free life. Pour your energy into seeking
Me. Enjoy Me and glorify Me in the midst
of adverse circumstances. When things
seem all wrong, trust Me anyway. I am
much less interested in right circumstances than in right responses to whatever
comes your way.” pg 27
“My Presence
watches over you continually, protecting you both from known and unknown
dangers. Entrust yourself to My watch care.” pg 32
Added on
February 8, 2018
Got a call
from the cancer center yesterday. An
appointment was made for Friday to teach me more about the chemos I will be
receiving and what to expect. An
appointment to receive my first chemo was scheduled for Monday at noon. They will draw blood first. If everything looks good chemo will begin.
Prayer
requests:
That the
chemo will completely obliterate every cancer cell in my body.
That the
side effects will be minimal.
That my
faith, trust and confidence in Jesus will continue to grow.
That I will
be joyful despite my circumstances.
That others
will be attracted to Jesus because of me and that I would boldly proclaim the
gospel when given the chance.
I have
several other friends battling cancer. (Bonnie, Tonya, Kathy, Wanda, Debbie, Bobbie,
Elaine) Please say a prayer for each of them. I know most of you probably also have friends or family in this
fight. Please take time right now to pray
for them and their families also.
Thank you
for reading and most of all THANK YOU
for your prayers!!!
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